|Posted on September 23, 2011 at 10:20 PM|
I wake up again in the middle of the night in a cold sweat from the same nightmare that I have been having since my mother met this mean, ugly, disgusting, dope addict of a boyfriend.
He is rude to her, and hardly ever say a word to me. He looks at me like I am the reason he can’t totally dominate my mother like he would like. When he does speak to me it’s in one word phrases like nope and yep.
He don’t work, but he seems to always have money, I would see him counting it with a wry smile on his face.
My mother receives food stamps so he don’t buy food and my mother gets a check every month so he never pays rent or anything else that I can see, and it leaves me with the reality that he is using my mom and beating my mom. He never has shown love to me or my mom since the day he walked into her life and invaded mine. He is so mean that he puts a chain lock on the refrigerator so that I only eat when my mom cooks dinner.
That leads me back to my nightmare, every time, the same dream. I walk into their bedroom right up to his side and take the gun he puts on the table next to him and points it right at his face as he sleeps. I stare at him with tears in my eyes because I know my mom wouldn’t approve of what I was about to do. The hairs suddenly stand up on arm as he opens his eyes slowly and starts to say “What tha…” when I pull the trigger and he falls back into his pillow, starts to violently shake as my mom wakes and falls out on her side screaming at me “What have you done! Oh Son what have you done!” and I wake up in a pool of my own sweat…