Emerald Dragon Archives

I pledge allegiance to the flag, which I can burn if I get mad, of the United (Divided) States of America--maybe--and to the Republic (which is now a Democracy) for which it stands (we're not certain), one nation under God (not really, sorta kinda, depending on who you ask), indivisible (which has something to do with ghosts), with liberty and justice for all (if you're lucky, and again, depending on who you ask).

Whew...

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I pledge my allegiance to the Late Great America and pay my taxes to stay out of jail.  One nation, many aliens and welfare for all, of thee I sing.  I dare to fly over American sky without crying or profiling.  I will work without raises or medical insurance to support CEOs, banks and defunct automakers.  I will eat Hamburger Helper and toil in my vegetable garden, while prisoners eat steak, watch color TV and pump iron.  I will keep my children and my children’...

I pledge allegiance to the flags of the United States of America, Guam, and Puerto Rico, and to the republic and territorial pocessions for which they stand,  nations under God, Allah, Budda, and various minority divinitive religions, indivisible, with liberty, cable and internet acess, and justice for all, including aliens and medical research clones. 

The road was dark and the only thing we could see was the road in front of us that only the headlights would allow us to see. I glanced at the clock, it was exactly 1:22 in the morning. My wife’s head lay on my shoulder as she slept quite deeply cause she had been up most of the day and night preceding our trip. I then noticed that we we’re driving into a heavy rain so I cut on the wipers, and the defrost because the windows fogged up quickly. On the radio there was a report that ...

After I lost my folks in a deadly accident at the age of eight, I started getting visited by spirits, not of my folks, but total strangers. It made no sense to me, and it scared me very much. And as this was all happening in my life I was taken in by my Aunt Lovena, she had a nice home and she was closest to my mother, her sister. She told me that they were best friends, and that her big sister would want her to raise me.

The spirits followed me into Aunt Lovena’s home and kept on...

I lay here in absolute total confinement in the fetal position enveloped in total darkness on a cold cement floor completely naked. They call this place “The Hole.”

The darkness is far blacker than night and I feel I know what it is like to be blind now. I can’t decipher night and day, there is no time here, time surely stands still in this hole from hell. After awhile I sit up and reach my hands out in front of my fac...

This day was no different from any other day in my life after loosing the one person that meant the world to me. I got up, showered and began my daily trek to my job in traffic that was stop and go for a solid hour and a half every morning. I approached a wreck ahead that was quite extensive and the traffic came to an immediate stop. I put my face down on the steering wheel knowing that I was going be late again but at the same time praying for whom ever was in that wreck ahead. Judging by th...

January 20, 8:30 a.m. The blonde actress who is now on the wrong side of 30 years old gets into her Escalade and is being driven to the Beverly Hills Courthouse AGAIN…for the 50th time. This was another instance of her being too coked up as well as drunk when she went to the Viper Room. When the cop pulled her over on Santa Monica Boulevard, it was at a place that would cause a major traffic jam in the right lane.

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Choppers were buz...

Benny was a fragile fool that could be easily hurt by the occasional innocent comment by his co- workers, so at the job he was shunned most of the time. Benny also was one of the smartest techs in the whole company. Ameritech Industries was a Robotics Company that made parts for Robots and other Robotic machines. Benny was the head Technician but he also was the master builder of Quality Robots, which made him seem sort of a recluse. Benny had a secret that no-one in the Company knew or could...

For those who don't speak Spanish, the wife's name is a bit of an inside joke. Verdugo is Spanish for "executioner."

This should have been foreseen. The video that would go viral on youtube that caused the downfall of Springer as one of the boob tube’s greatest “sleaze hosts,” was no accident. It looked like any other show.

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“Our first guest has been married to the same man for ten years, let’s ...